Romantic Relationships that Prepare Us for True Love

Our “in the meantime relationships” before meeting our true love actually prepares us for that right relationship. In these relationships our stories are mirrored to us, as every person that stands before us is our mirror.

These relationships that are preparing us cause us to question everything, especially ourselves. We ask why, what could I have done differently and we continue to “beat ourselves up”. Instead, we could look inward and ask:

What have I learned about myself?

What is the lesson or gold nugget that I am taking away from this experience?

Every relationship gives us the opportunity to do our soul work. The purpose of this journey is not to find someone to complete us, but to discover ourselves. I know that with each of my relationships I have more understanding, depth, authenticity and honesty.   I am willing to look at my shadow parts with love and acceptance.

For me life is a journey where I am always growing, transforming, shedding my fears and weaknesses. I know that if I devote my heart to discovering what I am here to learn, I can be my own best friend and love myself.

It is that self-love that allows me to come to my relationships in a healthy place with so much more to give. It allows me to be with my best friend not attached or dependent on this person.

There are no fears and there is no jealousy, no doubt, no guilt, no judgment—just being.

With each relationship we have the opportunity to grow and learn. We are also invited to keep our heart open to love while practicing forgiveness and compassion. Remember forgiveness is for us to release our fears and judgments.

This allows us to experience greater love each time until we meet the person who also has an open heart in which we can deeply connect with acceptance, love, compassion and authenticity.

Please comment below. I would love to hear about your experiences. For more tips on living a stress free life, clean eating or relationships sign up for my FREE audio and ebook above.

Purpose, Prosperity, Retreats, and Transformations!

The retreat (Purpose & Prosperity Mastermind Retreat) facilitated by my coach Paula Houlihan this weekend was the experience of a lifetime!  According to Paula, “A retreat is a time to come together in sisterhood, committed to the purpose of expansion, transformation and connection”.

Years ago, I had low self-esteem and felt unworthy.  I had issues around abandonment and rejection.  I was a care taker and sought approval from anyone.  I lived an overstressed, overwhelmed, and overworked life.  Sound familiar?  As if that was not enough, I have had several losses in my life including my parents, grandparents, niece, and my Identical Twin.  In the last ten years, I was blessed to have had good mentors, counselors and now, a fabulous coach!

I came to the retreat at Sundara Spa with an open mind and ready to relax.  The retreat was taking place at an awesome spa in Wisconsin known for their unique services.  I was treated like a queen!  My feather bed was turned down each night and a piece of organic orange and lavender caramel lay on my feather pillow.  I truly enjoyed the 8 Jet Body Spa Shower and the 75” Kohler whirlpool.  It was luxurious!  Pure decadence!

The spa cuisine was healthy, organic and artfully prepared.  The cuisine I indulged in included hummus, Spa Salad, Luscious fruit platter, veggie plate, yogurt, and a Sundara wrap with grilled chicken.  Of course, I had a glass of pinot noir with dinner.  Other delectable dishes included grilled salmon, Cornish game hen, crab cakes, house made guacamole, desserts, Australian lamb, and petite filet mignon.  The cucumber, lemon and orange water were terrific!  I especially love the cucumber water (water with cucumbers in it and what a flavor!).

Now that you know the decadent, nourishing, environment……….it is time to talk about the transformations! I made some great connections to brilliant women as we shifted and expanded together.  I shifted old beliefs especially about my body!  Janelle Maguire is an amazing talented photographer who brings out the brilliance and beauty in everyone!  I was so amazed at the beautiful pictures after the photo shoot.  For the first time, I saw my beauty in those pictures.  I looked radiant!  Now, how many of you can say that after having pictures taken?  An extraordinary photographer makes all the difference, hint….hint!

My soul expanded as did my vision and purpose.  I am filled with love and light and ready to serve women on a whole new level.  My beliefs around money and self-worth were transformed.  My spiritual Goddess has emerged!  I am ready to share my gifts with the world and be visible!  I assist women in eliminating their bandaids (drinking, drugs, overeating, workaholic, shopaholic, etc…) by transforming their fears, stress and negative beliefs into self-love, peace and joy.

My soul is alive and filled with love!  The colors of the rainbow are dancing in my spirit as my heart sings with pure bliss, knowing I am on my path and making a difference in the world.  I am filled with love, gratitude, passion, and joy.  How blessed I am for connecting with my kindred sisters soul to soul in this magnificent transformational journey!  Blessings to All!!!

If any of this resonates with you, please share in the comments below!  I would love to hear your thoughts.  If you have a kindred sister who could benefit from this post, please share!

Stress Management – The 3 Biggest Mistakes People Make in Managing Their Stress (Yes You)

  

By Lauren Ann Ebbecke ©2013

Stress is the number one leading cause of illness in our society today and no one is slowing down. Unfortunately, this stress can be a challenge for getting through the day, leading to reduced productivity, poor performance, and affect your attitude. What’s worse is that ongoing stress will lead to health problems in the long run, including obesity, high blood pressure, heart attacks and insomnia. If you want to live a healthy and happier life, then now is the time to set up a daily routine to keep your stress level in check.

 

Here are 3 of the biggest mistakes to avoid and what to do instead.

Mistake #1 – Eat comfort Junk Food – Chocolate, Coffee, and Ice Cream? I’ve seen so many people turn to eating fast food, pizza, mac –n- cheese and junk food to feel better or because they are so stressed and do not think they have time to cook a healthy meal. They end up eating two meals in one!

What to do instead – My students and coaching clients know the firm rule I have:

Always schedule time to sit down and eat a healthy meal. There are plenty of Eat Clean recipes and cookbooks that have simple healthy meals. If you make time to prep on Sunday afternoon for the week, then you will be less tempted to grab junk food when the going gets tough! Your body will definitely appreciate it.

Mistake #2 – Do Not Sleep Well – When people are under stress it is usually because they have not managed their time well and end up working twice as many hours. This leads them feeling like they are overworked, underpaid and stressed out. Be Proactive by getting organized.

What to do instead – Focus on getting more organized. Keep a calendar with all appointments, meetings and important activities clearly written and try using a colored pen like red or purple. In addition, make sure to schedule time for you to relax or exercise.

Mistake #3 – Do Not Exercise – Another common and costly mistake for being stressed out is not getting enough exercise or movement in your day. People get up (wishing they could go back to bed), make coffee, take a shower, get dressed and run out the door to work. They work all day and come home exhausted to raid the refrigerator, watch tv, eat ice cream and go to bed. No wonder there is stress!

Never underestimate what exercise will do for your physical and mental health! Try it for one week and notice how you feel at the end of the week.

What to do instead – Schedule at least 30 minutes a day five days a week for movement. Find an exercise you really like such as dancing, tennis, biking, walking, jogging, racquetball, or hiking in nature. Change your routine to keep it exciting. This is a really good thing, because not only will it relieve your stress, but you will become fit in the process!!

Bottom Line? You want to create a daily routine that always leads to a healthier you. And the quickest way to create this routine is to get organized and schedule time for you! No one else will do it for you! So, what steps are you taking to keep the stress out?

 

 

Giving and Living In Gratitude This Holiday Season

By Lauren Ebbecke ©2012

Well, it is the holidays once again.  For me, it is a joyous occasion and it is a reason for giving.  I use to practice gratitude during the holidays because I was too busy the rest of the year to think about it.  Now that I have made a practice to BE PRESENT at all times,  I practice gratitude every day.  This means that I experience the feelings as well as expressing it.  Gratitude is taking action or expressing it while appreciation is to value something or feel grateful for it.  Gratitude is the expression of appreciation.

I teach Anatomy & Physiology to nursing students.  I love to teach about the brain and positive emotions.  The research shows that positive thinking changes the brain neurons to allow us to experience more happiness.  This in turn lowers our stress response!  There can definitely be a lot of stress during the holiday season with family, dinners and expectations!  When our stress response kicks in our heart rate, blood pressure and sugar levels rise while our digestion stops.  Thus, long term stress is definitely not good for our bodies. [Read more…]

A Soulful Journey of Change with Confidence

By Lauren Ebbecke ©2012

It is Fall…. that time of year when leaves change color, the air turns colder, and days are shorter.  It spells CHANGE.  I have spent many an Autumn thinking, talking and dreaming of what my life might look like  “if       only…”.  If only I would exercise regularly, if only I would stick to eating healthy, if only I could find a job I truly love, if only I could find time to meditate, if only I could find my ”NorthStar”, my true calling, or  life purpose.  My intentions are good and I always start a routine.  Somehow time passes by and I am still searching for my dream…….

Ever feel like this?  This was the year I set my intention and decided to take action.  This was the year I quit my full-time job and began to fully create the life I have always dreamed of.  I was listening to my inner soul.  Yes, my intuition.  The fears come up, the negative voices come up, the challenges are there and yet, I continue on my path to a better life and to self-discovery.

I have never looked back and I am happy.  I have more time to spend with my beloved dog, Sage as well as friends.  I eat well, sleep well, and exercise.  I am investing in me.  Women tend to nurture and support everyone else around them, but we are not good about investing in ourselves.  We are also not confident in our decisions and especially with CHANGE.  Better yet, do you have the courage to change or step out of the box?  Our sandbox has become our comfort zone and we must step out of the box in order to grow.  So here are five tips to embrace change.

1.  Get Clear and set an intention.   Get clear about what you want to change and why.  Then set an intention to do so.  Make the intention simple.  My intention this summer was to find a part-time job that I enjoyed and could pay my bills, and then I would resign from my stressful full-time job.  Of course I had to define jobs that I would doing short term.  I got very clear as to why I wanted to leave my job and what type of working environment I wanted.  I said my intention out loud every morning and before I went to bed.

2. Be prepared for those old Habits and Mindsets.  “So you think you can really pull this off?  What will your friends say? Family?”  “I am not good enough” or “You should be perfectly happy as you have a decent job”.  Ah yes, the wonderful ego that tries hard to protect us.    One of my coaches said, “if your gut tells you yes, but you feel the fear…..do anyway”.  One of my favorite books is “Feel the Fear, Do it Anyway” by Susan Jeffers.

3.  Don’t Criticise yourself.  We are our own worst critics and we often think things are worse than they really are!!!  We want to be liked and fit in.  when something feels uncomfortable, our panel of judges arise to let us know that we aren’t doing the “right way” or the “way our elders did it”.  Acknowledge your shadows.  I typically say “I hear you, but I am choosing to better my life”.    I got that line from my mentor Christine Kane and it has proven to be one of the most powerful affirmations in my life.

4.  As the old zen saying goes, “Leap and the Net shall appear”.  Yes, this was another saying from my mentor that has served me well.  Women who take risks will grow and move ahead.  As Albert Einstein states, “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”.  So make a change and if it doesn’t feel good or it is not the right one, CHANGE it.  Yes, you can make another change!  This leads me to the next tip.

5.  Fail Forward!!! Too often when we make mistakes, we tend to blame ourselves or think poorly of ourselves.  We are not our mistakes.  Remember the Law of Attraction:  You attract the energy that is most like you.  In this case, Like Attracts Like!!!  So practice affirmations and feelings of abundance and success.  Successful people pick themselves up and keep going forward knowing they are not their mistakes.  As someone once said, “What you think, you are”.  Monitor your thoughts.  What are you thinking right now?  Is it positive or negative?  Think positive and fail forward.  Practice courage and confidence.

Best,

Lauren

What changes have you made lately?  I would be interested in reading about them.  Feel free to leave a comment below.

 

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